Wanting Magic

As I told a new client the other day, hypnosis isn’t magic.  “If I wanted magic I would have gone to a magician,” was his reply and I loved it.
As I think back it was all rather intriguing, the client came in regarding weight issues carrying a very large sandwich which he did not want to leave in the car and asked to put in our refrigerator.  It was heavy so I asked about it.  Turned out to be the remaining half of a submarine sandwich; he had just eaten the first half for breakfast.During my early training I once sat with a fifteen year old young woman, a runaway.  Sitting in my office I moved close to her, bent forward in my chair and looking directly in her eyes I asked, what do you want? “I want to die”, she said and I smiled.  I looked again in her eyes and said great, you came to the right place because I’m not going to let you.”

If that child had wanted to die she never would have come to see me, having come in my door meant she wanted to live.  I thought of her as I put the submarine sandwich away and wondered what this client was trying to say.

We all behave in a way that is meant to be beneficial, helpful in meeting our wants, needs or desires.  Whether smoking, drinking, eating too much, whatever, all our behaviors regardless of how self damaging are intended to somehow help ourselves.  You know the expression in the gym, “No pain not gain”?  Separating beneficial from injurious behavior is not so simple.

As you know from having been with me, throughout our conversation I continue to ask why you are here, what do you want.  You recall that it’s a repetitive question not because I have Alzheimer’s but because the answer continues to change, each time becoming more specific, leading the client to the essence of what change might mean, how their behavior is attempting to meet that need and what might be more effective.

Change is difficult for all of use but giving up what is not meeting our needs for what is more pleasurable is easy, that is the magic of hypnosis.Hypnosis allows us to move past the critical judgment of conscious thinking to view our own subconscious behavior in a more compassionate, realistic way. To compare what is not working with what will.

Change your thinking, change your life.